Rebecca Marie Monroy

Rebecca's visitation will be Friday 4p-6p at the McAlister-Smith Funeral Home, 200 State St, West Columbia, SC. (Light refreshments to be served. Business casual is perfectly fine.)

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the SC Oncology Foundation https://scoacares.org/donate

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Rebecca was born in San Antonio, Texas; the third and last child of Lorenzo Monroy and Dora Saldaña Monroy. She was a quietly forceful child, emotionally and academically intelligent, and grew up on Mariposa Drive with her older siblings Michael and Martha, and her beloved doggie mutts (a tradition which continued throughout her life). She attended Jefferson Davis High School, where she played tennis and excelled academically, despite her bluntly rebellious streak and her love of the (then) radical rock of Rush, Black Sabbath, and similar groups which entertained her and irritated her parents. (She later became, along with her daughters, a Swiftie. Such is the balance of the universe.) She was also a voracious reader, remembering with fondness going to the library most Saturdays with her father to check out the limit on books, which she would finish before the next Saturday. (If anyone wants to use stacks of books for structural support in their next building project, please come by our house.)

Rebecca began attending Rice University in Houston in 1983 and waited patiently (and unknowingly) for her future devotee and husband, Roy Shelley, until he began attending Rice in 1985. They met in an Advanced Social Psychology class in the fall of 1986 and began working on their own advanced social psychology research involving dating, marriage, and children. (Please accept our marriage and children as our thesis.) Roy says he knew Rebecca was “the one” when she was able to get the pink piece of the pie (entertainment) when they played as a team in Trivial Pursuit (he can’t remember names and has a blind spot for most pop culture) – she “completed” their team. Rebecca and Roy met many of their closest friends while at Rice.

Rebecca then attended law school at the University of Houston (U Hoo!) while Roy finished undergrad and worked at a small oil & gas company (as was du jour in Houston in the ’80s, after all). She and Roy then returned to his home state, and she began working as an attorney at Collins & Lacy in Columbia while he attended law school. She had her Texas bar license but could not immediately get her South Carolina license because, at that time, South Carolina had a requirement that attorneys had to have taken a tax class in law school in order to be licensed. After a pointed nod at Roy which conveyed the sacrifice she was about to make, she reluctantly enrolled in the tax class at the Univ of South Carolina School of Law. One week before the final, the SC Supreme Court eliminated the tax law class requirement. Her professor offered to allow her to take the exam anyway – an offer she graciously, and gleefully, declined. After getting her SC license, she handled commercial and insurance defense litigation for over a decade and eventually became a partner at C&L. Her favorite role, however, became being a mom.

Their first child, Rachel Saldaña Shelley, arrived in January 1998. Roy still remembers the exact moment when they chose her name as they were driving past a sunflower field on Hwy 378 near Brittons Neck, SC. (Which, fittingly, is where Roy’s ancestors settled in South Carolina.) It was the name of one of her high school friends and the name of the daughter of one of Roy’s law partners. And it was another “R” name – a tradition which would continue.

Rebecca was still working full time when Rachel was delivered, and, because family and friends had taken Rachel out of the room for an extended period of time, she picked up a work folder and started working on a case. Some karma of that moment must have become imbued in Rachel, as Rachel developed an intensity of spirit to accomplish her tasks and broader goals, like her mother. She is now a compliance analyst in the banking industry.

Riana Marie Shelley, after a rambunctious pregnancy (she was breach and the OB tried to turn her – which Rebecca likened to a medieval torture technique), finally made an appearance in November 2001. A C-section had been scheduled, but, true to form, Riana decided to arrive early, and Rebecca went into labor just before the scheduled date. Riana had also had close call travel adventure in utero, as Rebecca had traveled to British Columbia (for work, of course) in September and returned home September 10 th , just before the US and Canadian airspace was closed after the 9/11 attacks.

Rachel and Riana also gave Rebecca another traveling adventure in March of 2002. Roy had gone to Houston on a work trip and Rebecca was joining him with the girls for a vacation in Texas. She arrived early at the Columbia airport with a 4-year-old and a 5-month-old, along with all the usual accoutrements associated with same. As she juggled everything (and everyone), she approached the departure gate, saw it was boarding, and herded everyone (and everything) onto the plane. Notably, the airlines were not using the electronic boarding pass readers at that time, just a gate attendant looking at the paper passes, and Rebecca was hurried through with her unwieldly burdens. As they quickly settled in their seats, there was apparently a mix up with the seat assignments (clue #1) but that was resolved, bags and more bags were stowed, and they were seated just as the plane pulled away from the gate. Rebecca then looked at her watch and realized this plane was leaving an hour early (clue #2). She grabbed the arm of the businessman across the aisle and asked forcibly “Where is this plane going?” to which he startingly replied “New Jersey” (the “of course, you mad woman” was implied). Despite the flight attendant’s initial insistence that they could not return to the gate, they returned to the gate. That karma became imbued in Riana, developing in her a keen perception of people and events and a quiet (usually) power of persuasion, like her mother. She is now an early childhood educator currently living in New Orleans and plans to return to school for her master's degree.

Roy was sitting at a table in their playroom one morning in early 2003, reading the Sunday comics (on an actual newspaper!), when Rebecca announced she was pregnant with their third child. Ryan Nicholas Shelley was a Christmas baby (hence Nicholas), born in December 2003 shortly before the 25th. Ryan had the karma of these moments, and has developed a wry humor and generosity of spirit, like his mother. Ryan has also had the fortune (usually good) of having two older sisters, which has allowed him to develop the softer skills for navigating relationships (like his mother) but which also made him, while younger, the unwitting pawn of certain requests, such as “let’s go to the ice cream shop” and “let’s get a dog.” Now he is the witting pawn (and often the instigator). Ryan graduated from Cornell University in May, obtaining both his undergrad and master's degree (Economics) in 4 years. He was also sworn in as a 2nd Lieutenant in the US Marine Corps and looks forward to his career in service.

Although this account seems to be mostly about our kids, it is, at base, an account of Rebecca. A beautiful, kind, generous person with a sharp mind, a sophisticated sense of humor, and a quiet (usually) insistence on truth, honor, and helping others. Her spirit lives on in each of us. We will miss her terribly.